Emotional Intelligence

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Part 1 (a) – Skill Development
Regulating my emotions was one skill I developed. After a close examination of my emotional intelligence survey results, I found myself weak in dealing with emotional conflict. More specifically, I would rather fester conflict than deal with it directly. I hate dealing with conflict that has negative impact on my emotions as a person. I would rather avoid than deal with it. However, if it was unavoidable, I would prefer to postpone. Thanks to my coach Molly Tang who helped me understand that sometimes we become strong and aware by dealing with conflict directly. The realization brought me to the reality that I perhaps needed to develop a schedule that would help me regulate my emotions as a person. My coach and friend helped me get through the schedule. 
Part 1 (b) – Schedule Review and Observed Changes
I undertook breathing exercises three times a week. At first, the sacrifice was daunting and I found myself on a very hard schedule. To adhere to the journal, I had to develop personal discipline and this comes with courage and confidence. After every breathing exercise, it came to my knowledge that I felt like I had taken a nap. It was refreshing and re-awakening. After sometimes, I adjusted the breathing exercise to five times a week as it become easier and more familiar. I was now happy that could carry out the exercise with ease and still manage to keep the journal. A close review of breathing reveals that it allowed me to develop self-discipline much needed to face conflict. What is more, the consistency I developed by following the schedule allowed me to become strong, a benefit to my fight towards conflict regulation.
Part 1 (c) - Components of EI Development
The three components of emotional intelligence are; practice behavior, journaling, coaching and breathing exercise. As a person facing a poor intelligence about emotions, the above activities helped me achieve success although they came with challenges. The first difficulty I faced in practice behavior was to overcome myself and accept I was weak in understanding and dealing with emotional conflict. The journaling activity had its difficulties too. I had to fill the blank spaces daily before I slept, this was challenging as it was difficult. It’s more like doing a small assignment on a daily basis. The breathing exercise, just as stated, was challenging at first. 
I found it difficult to contain myself and especially calming down in the first minutes. I also found it hard to cultivate concentration because the exercise was more like meditating. It required cleaning the head of all noises and opening the mind to the exercise. Finally, I did not find much difficulties in coaching. Molly Tang, my personal coach was a close friend who was ready to listen and extend empathy. Using her critical thinking, Molly would give informed decisions about my problems and I found her a very good coach. 
Although I had to persevere the schedule and activities as seen above, they luckily were a success in one way or the other. I have improved. The first success I encountered is the ability to make tough decisions and stand with them. During my part-time job at a restaurant, I found it difficult and disheartening to mix expired flour and good one as was the norm of the restaurant. Deep inside, I sympathized with customers who were unknowingly consuming sub-standard food courtesy of the hotel’s unethical practices. Although young, I faced the manager about it and quit the job. I couldn’t stand this. It is evident that the exercise had helped me make decisions and follow them to core. Even today, I believe this is one greatest strengths within my possession.
Another success I leveraged from the exercises was that of sitting down for long hours of study. Previously, I could not stand a thirty minutes study time. I felt tired and wanted to have some smoke or visit an entertainment website. However, after the exercise, I learnt to concentrate in studies. I knew that I wanted to score better grades and excel in my studies, therefore, long hours of study were indispensable. Through the mental exercises I had taken, I had developed the ability to listen to myself and open my mind to whatever I was doing. Apparently, I translated this to studies and it has been a success ever since.
Part 2 – Team Work, Relationships and Ethics
Team work, ethics and relationships were some of the things I cultivated. My time with Molly Tang was quite productive. I admired Molly’s boldness and her ability to lead and give informed judgments after a critical thought. My admiration for her and her boldness enabled me to understand that we are liked because of the strengths we possess. To some extent, this helped me develop teamwork and interpersonal relationships. I also developed a substantive sense of ethics.
My ability to notice the wrong at the restaurant and quit the job was courtesy of my sense of responsibility. Although it affected my job, and to some extent the sense of the people I was working with, it helped define my consciousness as a person. Interpersonal relationships are the foundation of ethics (Goleman, 2009). If we can compromise friendships and contracts for what is good and just, we can overcome ourselves. This is the beginning of a conscious and ethical self.
The entire journey demanded a lot of effort to change the person in me. It was challenge to recognize my weaknesses and work towards them. All the training and exercise I took was successful. It enabled me develop skills and experience much needed to overcome my weaknesses. Every time I faced a challenge, I often refer back to this experience. It is evident that with the right mind set, we can solve any challenge and move forward. It all zeroes down to discipline and self-sacrifice. 


References
Goleman, Daniel. Emotional Intelligence: Why It Can Matter More Than Iq. London: Bloomsbury, 2009. Print.
Goleman, Daniel. Working with Emotional Intelligence. , 2009. Internet resource.

 
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